few more weeks

I still have 2-3 weeks to decide, should I go or not? I think I should hehe! For the past 3 years ito na ang dilemma ko and if I'll stay longer additional days, weeks, months and years na naman. I need to be BRAVE and FIRM and READY to take the risk.

1 more month

1 more month..sure na ba ko sa gagawin ko? bakit parang habang papalapit parang ayoko na.. Masyado ng late para mag backout :( Sana hindi ako maging miserable..

Swim by Jack's Mannequin

You've gotta swim Swim for your life Swim for the music That saves you When you're not so sure you'll survive You gotta swim And swim when it hurts The whole world is watching You haven't come this far To fall off the earth The currents will pull you Away from your love Just keep your head above I found a tidal wave Begging to tear down the dawn Memories like bullets They fired at me from a gun A crack in the armor I swim to brighter days Despite the absence of sun Choking on salt water I'm not giving in I swim You gotta swim Through nights that won't end Swim for your families Your lovers your sisters And brothers and friends Yeah you've gotta swim Through wars without cause Swim for the lost politicians Who don't see their greed as a flaw The currents will pull us Away from our love Just keep your head above I found a tidal wave Begging to tear down the dawn Memories like bullets They fired at me from a gun Cracking me open now I swim for brighter days Despite the absence of sun Choking on salt water I'm not giving in Well I'm not giving in I swim You gotta swim Swim in the dark There's no shame in drifting Feel the tide shifting and wait for the spark Yeah you've gotta swim Don't let yourself sink Just find the horizon I promise you it's not as far as you think The currents will drag us away from our love Just keep your head above Just keep your head above Swim Just keep your head above Swim, swim Just keep your head above Swim

don't know what to do..

God, please help me.. ayoko po ma-stress pero ang mga pangyayari sa paligid sobrang nakaka-stress na :(

today

Today, I choose to be CALM and POSITIVE despite all the not-so-good-things that are happening. Sabi nga, wala namang ulang nagtatagal.

gusto ko magpunta sa Holy Land

rants

ranting again, ang tagal ko na pala nagrarant dito hehe! parang 2 years na yata and yet andito pa din ako.. hay.. mas lalo akong walang magawa ngayon kasi I need this, I need this until the 1st quarter of 2013, I have no choice but to stay. This is not the right time to walk away and start a new kaya ang hirap. Wala na nga akong nagawa dati nung pwedeng pwede lalo na ngayon hindi pa pwede lalo akong walang magawa. Kelan ka ba darating? ang tagal tagal mo naman.. naka ilang birthdays and Christmases na ko pero wala pa din. Nag stop na ko kaka-pray para syo wala pa din :( Kelan ba talaga? pagod na ko eh.. habang tumatagal hindi ko na nagugustuhan. I am being penalized for something that I didn't do or is out of my control bakit ganon? kasalanan ko ba kung nalugi yung client? kasalanan ko ba kung may absences and lates yung consultants? hindi ko kayang pigilan yung mga ganong sitwasyon, but why? why do I have to suffer?? bakit pag may excess/GAIN hindi ma-share sa akin/sa amin?? bakit sole benefit nyo lang?? pero pag LOSS kahati ako/kami??? UNFAIR! I've said this for countless times and I'm saying this again.. AYOKO NA! this time sobrang ayoko na :(